It has almost been 3 years now since my nephew died. At times it is easier at times it is not. I always wonder if he had lived longer would we have gotten along better than we did. He and I were working on our issues with each other and making great progress. Even though our problem he was Ty's nephew and his best friend, and I loved him as that. I would have done anything for him. So what if he had issues with me stemming from the relationship with his mother. ( He hated for the longest time because he believed I was like his mother. He believed that because Ty and I had a lot of problems in the beginning that I was controlling Ty and I was no better than Zach's mom who is all evil incarnate. Later he figured out that everything going on was not just because of what I was doing but was because of everyone else involved as well. Naturally being Ty's nephew he sided with Ty and the others(we weren't married when all of this was going on)). Once he figured out I was nothing like his Mom, we were finally starting to work things out. I can honestly say I think had he lived we may have even became friends. However he passed not long after we moved back from Maine so we were never fully able to work everything out. Nov. 17th is the anniversary date so I may not be on much for a little while. At least not when I am thinking about things. I just miss him so much and really wish he was still here and can see his cousins. I know they'd love him. I know Jon was very small when Zach died but occasionally he still mentions his Zen. Even when we go through the very few pictures we have of Zach, he recognizes his face. Zach always hated pictures and deleted a lot of them off of the computer or tore them up. I try to stay sane around Ty right now and do my best not to loose it around him. When Ty is asleep or now around is a whole other story though. Zach will never be forgotten in this household. He died so young. He is missed and love greatly. I know he watches over us. I can feel his presence.




Zack we love and miss you. You were always welcome to be a part of our lives, and always will be a part of us. Never forget that. Rest in Peace.


Zachery Glen Chasteen
April 30, 1990- Nov 17-2006
Missed by family and friends alike.
You left this world before your time.

Gizzmoe had her babies today some time between 8 am and 11 am this morning. She had 5 but one didn't make it. The other 4 are doing great. She hates being in the spare room but seems to understand it is for the best right now. She acts like she needs my approval with the kittens and nudges them my way when I am in the room. She wants my attention more than ever and I am glad to oblige. Pictures have been posted for everyone to enjoy and I will upload new ones every few days or so. They are so cute but so ugly at the same time. There is a red one, a cream one, a mostly black one with white feet and nose, and a black and white tuxedo. The one that didn't make it was a red as well. Well keep on the look out for new pictures as I will post more of the kittens as I can.

As of yesterday it has been 3 years since my wonderful Husband and I took our vows. I really cannot believe it has been that long already. Time sure does seem to fly!!

We did what we have done on every anniversary and even on our wedding night and we took the kids Trick or Treating. I was fun. This year they at least knew what to do and Adryan didn't try to walk into peoples houses. However he took as much candy as he could when he was allowed to get his own and always tried to grab his own. He was Batboy and Jon was a Pirate.

Just 2 years to go and my husband and I are going to do a traditional hand binding ceremony. We were married Justice of Peace because we could not afford a real wedding. We are going to start putting back a little money at a time so we can have a decent ceremony, and we need to find a Pagan priestess to perform the ceremony for us.

Anyways happy anniversary belated to Pooka (you know who you are). Sorry I didn't get a chance to call and say so. Give the baby love for me, and hope we get to meet her soon. :hugs:

Well goodnight and Blessed Be.

I finally got my first 1,000 page views. Thanks to everyone who has checked out my gallery.

I cannot believe I have been married for almost 3 yrs. now. It seems it can't be that long since then. Life just speeds by when you really don't pay attention to it. My kids are both in school now and I a, working on going back to school and trying to get our lives straightened out financially so we no longer will need government help to raise the beautiful little boys that I have brought into this world. I am ready to be a stable household without the government strings holding us up. I am glad to be going back to school to be an architectural designer. I love the challenge involved in doing so. I love to create things that people will look at years down the road. I already have many ideas of building structures that would be neat looking and environmentally friendly. I am tried of looking at a cracker box society where every Tom, Dick, and Jane have houses that look very similar to their neighbors. Where is the creativity in these houses. Blah! There isn't any. That is what I want to change and I swear one day I will! Anyway...

I am planning to do the same thing on my anniversary as the last 2 and our wedding night. We are going Trick or Treating with the boys. Yeah I know but hey I love Samhain (or Halloween as non-pagans call it). It is actually my favorite holiday so we will have fun with the kids.

Well enough of this for now. They keep coming upstairs here wanting Mommy to come play with them. So off I go...